Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Crazy Train

As most of you know my sister got married a few weeks ago. She was the most beautiful bride on the most beautiful day! It was a perfect wedding for her and her Groom. I'm so happy for her and I'm thrilled to have Tim in our the real torture begins for him. I hope to have some photos up on here pretty soon.

Of course, the days leading up to the wedding were insane. I flew one of my best friends in from Arkansas to photograph the wedding. She ended up tagging along for the majority of the time we were up in the Bay Area. I really felt for her! Mom, Lindsay, and me in full stress mode, running around like crazy people. Most people couldn't handle it. She had planned for it though. She told me that if mom or Lindsay started acting up, she'd throw a box of wine at them. That's when I realized she's one of the few people who could handle the job. She knew the secret elixir to my family's drama and stress! Wine!

It was a busy few days before the wedding. We divided and conquered. We ran errands. We made food. We picked stuff up here and dropped it off there. We spent far too much time working on the photo booth. We did it all and there was a lot of shit to do! I don't think I had that much to do before my own wedding!

However, Tracy worked like a champion. She was in it for the long haul. I owe her so much and I still haven't figured out a way to thank her...I'm working on it though! Not just for the endless helping...but for putting in so much time with my mother. When faced with the decision to run an errand with me and Mario or my mom, she usually chose my mom. This tells us two things. 1)My mom is pretty stinking cool. 2) My friends are just as insane as my family.

She learned many lessons for the five days she was out visiting. She learned my mother doesn't care if you know the person she is talking about...she will talk to you as if you do know them, whether you like it or not. She learned not to ask will only make the story longer and possibly confuse my mother, making her start a whole new story before finishing the last story. She learned that my mother can change subjects before you have had a chance to acknowledge she is talking to you. She learned that a the love of tomatoes in our family expands many generations and is deeper and more dangerous than you can imagine. Every time they came back from an errand, Tracy had a whacked out story to tell me about my mother. She also has a much better understanding of why I am as strange as I am.

My favorite story was the day before the wedding. Mom and Tracy had gone to all the major stores for supplies. Costco, Safeway, Sams Club, Michael's. They just needed to stop at a small fruit stand just down the street to pick up a few things. They pulled in, got the last of the veggies on the list and paid in record time. They then hopped back in mom's car to head back home. As they exited the parking lot, mom mentioned that she really needed to be driving the other direction. Not thinking anything of it, they drove on.

All of a sudden mom slams on the breaks in the middle of the street coming to a screeching halt!

Mom "Do you think we can do it?"

Tracy looks around. Not seeing any cars on the street, she says, "Yeah, it looks clear. You can flip a U'ey here."

Mom "No. Look!" Pointing to an object in the gutter on the passenger side of the car.

Tracy "What?"

Mom, "There! A tomato! Do you think it's good still? Do you think we can jump out and steal it cause it's in the street?"

Now, Tracy stops here cause she's laughing so hard. To her this was the whole story. She can't believe that my mother would slam on the breaks with such urgency...for a tomato in the street. She still can't figure out how the hell my mother even saw a tomato on the side of the road.  I guess when you love tomatoes, you constantly have an eye out for them. Tracy hadn't seen a thing before mom pointed it out. What she does now understand is my family's love for tomatoes.

Of course I knew there was one question that still needed to be answered. Did they jump out and get the tomato?

Tracy "Of course I jumped out and got the tomato."

Me "So you just go along with her crazy shit.You know you only encourage her when you do that."

Tracy "I know, but she was so excited about the tomato."

I love Tracy more for going along with my mom's shit. In writing this, I think I've figured out that she kept choosing to go with my mom for the excitement. Mom did do a lot more exciting stuff like stealing tomatoes off the side of the road, cussing out old people driving, and her hard core search for clown noses just before the wedding.

I might have to get some more mom stories from Tracy....there were a lot. There is probably more stuff that my mom did, that I probably don't want to know about. My sister and I tend try to keep her in line, while Tracy just let her be her crazy self. I do love that my mom is just on the cool side of crazy. Of course I know that I'll be riding that crazy train soon enough.

1 comment:

  1. You forgot about the family dinner at the chinese place where she kept spinning the lazy susan when people were trying to get the food......and Lindsay had to tell her to leave it alone so people could eat. I finally figured out that I can post comments as Anonymous.


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